Author Archives: tricialathrop

Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 19, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 18

Sad news, Tony passed into heaven this morning. Well, sad for his family and friends, a day of rejoicing for him because he is with the Lord Jesus and no longer in pain.

Death is brought to the forefront of my thoughts again. Once, I gave a speech on Jesus’ crucifixion, I began with, “Death, the Final Frontier”.

As Jesus hung on the cross, he experienced death and a separation from God for the very first time from eternity. He knew it would be difficult, and prayed for God to find another way to save people from their sins. In the end, He yielded to God’s plan.

We can have a lot of head knowledge, but the experience takes it to a new level. We will all face our own death at some point. On this side, we don’t have the experience, just some knowledge about how it happens. We only have faith as to what lies beyond, it is truly our final frontier.

The death of a loved one brings a grief that overwhelms us. We are somewhat sustained by the hope of a painless and joyful eternal life in the presence of the Lord.

As a follower of Jesus Christ, I believe that once this earthly body dies, it will be as if I go to sleep and wake in the presence of the Lord. Will that help me face death with more hope and less fear? I really don’t know.

I am thankful that Jesus came to earth to experience death for us, so that we live in heaven with the Lord forever.

I pray for Tony’s family as they deal with the loss of their loved one, that they will have the peace and comfort that only God can give.

I rejoice that we have the hope of eternal life.

Where’s the joy? God cared enough about each one of us, that He sent Jesus to suffer on the cross so that we could live forever with Him.

As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of Man be lifted up; so that whoever believes will in Him have eternal life. For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. John 3:14-16

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 19, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 17

Norm is back in the chemo pit. The day began well, we went out for breakfast, then about three pm, he crashed. He didn’t feel well and slept the rest of the day. One never knows from day to day whether it will be up or down.

It came on suddenly and a day later than expected. I can assure him that it will only last a day or two, but his mind can’t wrap itself around hope when he is in the pit. All I can do is sit beside him and comfort him until he settles.

We are in the middle of this marathon. I know these days will happen, seven more treatments to go. I also know that next week he will feel much better and stronger.

Going through this reminds me of one of Jesus’ miracles. They passed a man blind from birth. The disciples asked the cause of the blindness…his fault or his parents? But Jesus said it was so that God could be glorified. This man lived all his life, day after day without hope of ever seeing. Then one day Jesus came and he was totally healed.

We can ask all kinds of questions. Why did this man have to suffer with blindness until he was an adult? Why this man, and another left unhealed? Why do we have to suffer at all? I don’t know the whys, but I know that God is sovereign and God is good. He’s God, He makes the decisions and one day we will discover what our suffering is all about.

As He passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind?”

Jesus answered, “It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him. We must work the works of Him who sent Me as long as it is day; night is coming when no one can work. While I am in the world, I am the Light of the world”

When He had said this, He spat on the ground, and made clay of the spittle, and applied the clay to his eyes and said to him, “Go, wash in the pool of Siloam (which is translated Sent). So he went away and washed, and came back seeing. John 9:1-7

I am thankful for the Sovereign Lord, who knows all things and makes the right decisions.

I pray for the healing of Donna, Kathy, Tony and Norm as they go through chemotherapy to eliminate their cancer.

I rejoice in the Lord who does heal, even if in his sovereignty he chooses not to.

Where is the joy? The joy of the Lord, is my strength. Nehemiah 8:10

Blessed be the Lord, because He has heard the voice of my supplication The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart exults, and with my song I shall thank Him. Psalm 28:6-7

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 18, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 16

Norm is doing great today. He learned how close he was to dying, and is amazed at how much he has improved.

Today, I got some bad news. A friend with cancer may be going into hospice. An uncle of my daughter’s boyfriend tried to commit suicide. A local women’s choir I love to sing with is going through some major upheaval.

Jesus said in John 16:33, “In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”

We’d love to live trouble free lives…is there such a thing? Hopefully our troubles cause us to lift up our eyes to the One who can help…and if He doesn’t take the trouble away, He will walk through it with us.

I am thankful to have been able to participate in the Nativity Choir this year.

I pray for Tony to be cured of cancer, for Ideen’s family as they deal with an attempted suicide and its repercussions, and the ladies choir.

I rejoice that even though it all looks like a mess, the Lord has this.

Where’s the joy? For unto you is born in the city of David, a Savior which is Christ the Lord.

But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 18, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 15

A great day! A friend of Norm’s came to hang out with him while I sang in the Nativity Choir. My daughter joined me in singing.

It is fun to sing in a hundred plus voice choir with an orchestra ensemble. The sound support, the harmonies, the joyful voices all raised in praise to God. We end with the “Hallelujah Chorus”, always a favorite, challenging to sing, but beautiful when done well.

I am thankful for the opportunity to sing each year. I thought it wasn’t going to happen this year.

I pray for Norm for strength of heart and mind, especially as the chemo pit days lie ahead.

I rejoice in the Lord of lords, and the King of kings who is worthy of all honor and praise.

Where’s the joy? God is faithful in all situations.

For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; and the government will rest on His shoulders; and His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.

There will be no end to the increase of His government or of peace, on the throne of David and over his kingdom, to establish it and to uphold it with justice and righteousness from then on forevermore. Isaiah 9:6-7

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 15, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 14

Today I dealt with anger.

I’m angry at the cancer that has my husband dealing with the pain and frustration of chemo treatments. I’m angry at my husband for getting cancer…not that he had any choice in the matter.

I’m angry at God for taking us down this path.

I’m angry that I can’t do what I want when I want. I’m angry at the things I’m missing: celebrating my 70th birthday, celebrating my grand-daughter’s birthday, seeing the Christmas lights, singing at nursing homes with a local choir, decorating the house…

I never considered myself as one who got angry, I see it as a negative trait. But I hid my anger well under the cover of withdrawal, quiet frustration, and hurt feelings. So I guess this is progress, to recognize and admit I get angry.

My circumstances are better than my anger shows. I travelled to Knoxville to sing in the Nativity Pageant. I got to spend time with my daughter who came in to help. Norm is having a pretty good day.

I enjoy singing in the pageant, it is a yearly reminder of the love that God showered on us by sending His Son to live among us, to demonstrate the love and grace that the Lord God has toward us, and to die on the cross so that we can have a great relationship with the Lord, creator of the universe.

I am thankful that God loves me even when I am angry at Him.

I pray for His peace and comfort when I’m helpless to change my attitude.

I rejoice in the coming of Jesus Christ who bore all our sins and sorrows on the cross.

Where’s the joy? Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so.

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation.

Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of christ, be reconciled to God.

He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. 2 Corinthians 5:17-21

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 14, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 13

Today Norm received his third of six body chemos and the fifth of twelve total chemos. We spent four hours at the cancer center, watched a lot of patients come and go. I didn’t hear one complaint.

There are times when patients and caregivers go through the dark side of fear, anger, frustration etc. But one the lighter side we can find hope, encouragement, and joy. One can dream of what comes after the healing. We can spend more time with family, it will be good to hug our grandchildren Sierra and Sawyer. We can look forward to times of laughter and games with the kids and siblings. We will enjoy getting together with friends. We can dream of traveling to places near and far.

When the Lord seems to give extra time, when we face our own mortality, the question arises, “What will I do with the time He has given?”. What legacy will I leave behind?

None of us know what each day will bring. While we can plan for the future, we live day by day. That is where we make our legacy. Our daily actions and words determine how we are remembered and provide the joy for each day.

He who watches the wind will not sow and he who looks at the clouds will not reap. Just as you do not know the path of the wind and how bones are formed in the womb of the pregnant woman, so you do not know the activity of God who makes all things. Sow your seed in the morning and do not be idle in the evening, for you do not know whether morning or evening sowing will succeed, or whether both of them alike will be good. Ecclesiastes 11:4-6

I am thankful that God faithfully works in ways we cannot see.

I pray for each person I saw at the cancer center today, along with Donna and Tony, that the treatment they receive do its work with minimal side effects. And for each of the nurses who have such a positive attitude of encouragement for each person in their care.

I rejoice that I am seeing progress in Norm’s treatment. He is getting better.

Where’s the joy? The joy is in the hope in the promises of God. He has made the promises, he will accomplish them.

For as the rain and snow come down from heaven, and do not return there without watering the earth and making it bear and sprout, and furnishing seed to the sower and bread to the eater; So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth; It will not return to Me empty, without accomplishing what I desire, and without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it. For you will go out with joy and be led forth with peace; The mountains and the hills will break forth into shouts of joy before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. Isaiah 55:10-12

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 13, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 12

Day to day, one never knows how it will go. Our day started well, then as the afternoon progressed, Norm seemed to grow weaker. I don’t know if it’s knowing that tomorrow he returns for another round of chemo or if we did too much yesterday

Being the primary caregiver takes its toll. Every nuance of change triggers a rise in adrenalin…the uncertainty of it all. One step forward, two steps back. Sometimes a leap forward and then a regressing. It’s an emotional roller-coaster for both of us.

Yet, even with the set backs, he is so much better than he was seven weeks ago when we got the diagnosis. He’s up and about, eating…not a lot, but more than he was, and looking forward to the future.

Friends help. I had lunch with a friend who has walked this path. It’s encouraging to speak with someone who has a similar experience.

I am thankful that although there are set backs, the general progress is towards strength and healing.

I pray for strength of heart to continue and peace of mind through the challenges…for both of us, and anyone else who struggles with an issue out of their own control.

I rejoice that God promised to never leave us or forsake us.

The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. Deuteronomy 31:8

Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Where’s the joy? To be honest, not feeling it.

My friend and I talked about putting on a cheerful face when among people. She’s good at it, few see through to the pain. I tend to withdraw and become quiet. If I must be with people, I will talk about anything else because the tears are on the edge, ready to flow at any time.

Where’s the joy? It’s waiting on the other side of the tears and seen in the hope found in God’s promises.

Sing praise to the Lord, you His godly ones, and give thanks to His holy name. For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for a lifetime; Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:4-5

Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting. He who goes to and fro weeping, carrying his bag of seed, shall indeed come again with a shout of joy, bringing his sheaves with him. Psalm 126:5-6

Then the virgin will rejoice in the dance, and the young men and the old, together. For I will turn their mourning into joy and will comfort them and give them joy for their sorrow. Jeremiah 31:13

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 12, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 11

I didn’t write yesterday. Some days it is tough to process all that happens One day at a time, one foot in front of the other.

After an extra day in the hospital, Norm came home. The care at the hospital is awesome, the TLC shown by each staff member in words and actions goes a long way in minimizing suffering. But it’s not home.

The unfamiliarity, the flickering lights and shadows of the machines, the sounds, alarms…all disturb a sense of rest.

Norm was glad to be home. He looked around and commented on the lack of Christmas decoration, no tree, no nativities. I did pull out our Christmas plates and cups. It’s not been a priority. Since he mentioned it, I’ll get some things out. Definitely more low key this year.

As I wrote this, I thought of a quote from How the Grinch Stole Christmas by Dr. Seuss. “And the Grinch with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

We are definitely having a Christmas without a lot of the ribbons and wrappings. But I think we’ll get back to the heart of Christmas.

I am thankful that Norm is home.

I pray for all who are dealing with devastating illness or disability this season, that they will find times of fun and happiness in the celebration this year.

I rejoice in the Reason for the Season, the coming of the Son of God who died on the cross to bring salvation to all humanity.

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men. Luke 2:7-14

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might by saved through Him. John 3:16-17

Where’s the joy? The Lord has come!

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 10, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 9

Rough day. Norm wanted to come home, but the chemo levels had not reduced enough for him to leave the hospital.

He did so well before and on the chemo that I forgot the after effects that show up on Monday and Tuesday, the discouragement, the emotional let down, the weakness…I know on Wednesday he’ll start climbing out of the pit, but until then he needs an extra boost.

I am grateful for those people who are contacting him, wrapping him virtually in their arms with love and concern, praying for him to keep fighting the cancer. Knowing people are supportive goes a long way. I don’t know how anyone walks this road without the hope that is in Christ. This is a tough road.

I am thankful for the loving support of family, friends, and friends of friends that we do not know.

I pray that Norm will have stamina in body, heart and mind to weather this storm.

I rejoice that God has this all in his hand, even when I don’t sense it.

Where’s the joy? God sends people from all walks of life to encourage both of us, reminding us that he is always there.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:

He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul:

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil: for thou art with me;

Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies:

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life:

And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Psalm 23

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Where’s the Joy?

Posted on December 9, 2024 by tricialathrop

December 8

Norm was alert enough today to take a few walks around his floor. While we walked we saw a lady, a fellow patient walking alone.

Norm went back to the room and I headed down to the cafeteria. As I exited his room, the lady walked by. I joined her as I headed to the door, but kept going with her instead of exiting. While we walked, she shared her story.

Like Norm, six months ago she was healthy. She danced ballet with a group that ministered in jails using song, dance and theater. She ate the right things, had an active lifestyle…all the good healthy things. But some cancers hit no matter how healthy you are. This one hit hard. It took time, doctors thought it was something else, tests and finally a trip to the ER discovered her cancer.

No one wants a diagnosis of cancer and the need for chemo therapy, radiation, or surgery. But a proper diagnosis will lead to the treatment necessary for healing, whatever one has.

I came away from this encounter thinking that all of us suffer in some way. It could be a broken relationship, illness, job insecurity, or lack thereof, addiction, failure…all of us struggle in some way, it’s the nature of our life on this world.

What we miss? We don’t have to struggle alone. God created us to live in community and he desires that we encourage one another along the way.

No matter where we are in our suffering, we can be an encouragement to another. It costs us nothing to give someone a genuine smile. It may be the encouragement one needs to keep trying.

A kind word goes a long way. The people who serve us in restaurants and stores, a kind word may give them the strength to keep going. That mom with a screaming kid doesn’t need your critical looks and snide remarks…I’ve been there…she’s already embarrassed.

A smile, a kind word, an act of kindness go a long way. If we take a moment to look outside our own box of struggles and show a bit of kindness to another, we will find our own burden a little lighter and perhaps get a spark of joy along the way.

I am thankful for the nurses and staff at UT Medical center floor 5West for their help, attention and kindness that they show to the patients and the families.

I pray for Norm, Donna, Tony and my new friend Cathy who are suffering with the surprise diagnosis of cancer, and enduring the treatments. I pray for their complete healing and strength to endure the treatments and wisdom for the doctors.

I rejoice that God gave us community so that we do not have to suffer alone.

Where’s the joy? Today, I found it in Cathy, a new friend with a great attitude.

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8

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