December 12
Day to day, one never knows how it will go. Our day started well, then as the afternoon progressed, Norm seemed to grow weaker. I don’t know if it’s knowing that tomorrow he returns for another round of chemo or if we did too much yesterday
Being the primary caregiver takes its toll. Every nuance of change triggers a rise in adrenalin…the uncertainty of it all. One step forward, two steps back. Sometimes a leap forward and then a regressing. It’s an emotional roller-coaster for both of us.
Yet, even with the set backs, he is so much better than he was seven weeks ago when we got the diagnosis. He’s up and about, eating…not a lot, but more than he was, and looking forward to the future.
Friends help. I had lunch with a friend who has walked this path. It’s encouraging to speak with someone who has a similar experience.
I am thankful that although there are set backs, the general progress is towards strength and healing.
I pray for strength of heart to continue and peace of mind through the challenges…for both of us, and anyone else who struggles with an issue out of their own control.
I rejoice that God promised to never leave us or forsake us.
The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. Deuteronomy 31:8
Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
Where’s the joy? To be honest, not feeling it.
My friend and I talked about putting on a cheerful face when among people. She’s good at it, few see through to the pain. I tend to withdraw and become quiet. If I must be with people, I will talk about anything else because the tears are on the edge, ready to flow at any time.
Where’s the joy? It’s waiting on the other side of the tears and seen in the hope found in God’s promises.
Sing praise to the Lord, you His godly ones, and give thanks to His holy name. For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for a lifetime; Weeping may last for the night, but a shout of joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:4-5
Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting. He who goes to and fro weeping, carrying his bag of seed, shall indeed come again with a shout of joy, bringing his sheaves with him. Psalm 126:5-6
Then the virgin will rejoice in the dance, and the young men and the old, together. For I will turn their mourning into joy and will comfort them and give them joy for their sorrow. Jeremiah 31:13
TRICIA LATHROP 