Posts Tagged With: hope

Where’s the Joy?

December 1

Christmas comes with great joy and anticipation. The joyful narrative of Jesus’ birth, announced with the joyful words of the angels. “For unto us a child is born in the city of David, a savior who is Christ the Lord.” Children and adults sing joyful carols like “Joy to the World”, “Angels We Have Heard on High”, “Deck the Halls” and “Jingle Bells” everywhere we go. Our eyes delight in the colors of the season, red, green, gold, silver and rich blues and purples, even the whimsical pink ornaments. We joyfully give and receive gifts.

It’s my favorite time of the year. But this year will be different.

One month ago, the doctor revealed that my husband, Norm, after months of testing, had the dreaded C-word. It’s an aggressive cancer that requires aggressive treatment, three rounds of chemo in the last four weeks.

In the last four months, we’ve seen plan after plan fall to the wayside. Norm’s trip to photograph canyons and mountains in the west, fell to the wayside as he grew weaker and weaker. Plans to go north and see the fall colors in Vermont and follow the peak colors along the Blue Ridge Parkway and all through the Smokies, vaporized as we searched for answers. Christmas plans to celebrate the holiday with our children and grandchildren won’t happen until his treatment is complete. Norm will miss our traditional holiday events, “The Christmas Carol”, a play we’ve seen for the last 30 years…except for the Covid years, The Nativity Pageant, the lighting of the town Christmas Tree. While I’ll be able to participate in some of these events, it will be without him.

Where’s the joy? For a time, I focused on the losses of missed events and family connections. I continue to watch my husband struggle in health and attitude. My faith is challenged, knowing God can miraculously remove the cancer from his body, but has chosen to allow Norm to go through the pain of chemo.

So this year for the Advent season, I decided to search for joy and to write each day. It’s an unknown path, with an unknown result and there may be days I miss.

A verse that keeps coming to mind during this journey: “Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.

My thanks for today: From September to October, Norm endured test after test. Along the way, doctors recognized his need for answers. Each one had a part in getting the ball rolling and keeping at it until an answer was reached. The oncologist sent him immediately to the hospital, where they discovered the cancer had advanced faster than anticipated. I am grateful for the doctors, nurses and support staff at the University of Tennessee Hospital cancer unit. Their care and concern is far above what I expected. My husband is alive today because of the care and intervention of these doctors: Dr. Semeco, Dr. Hayes, Dr. Wheeler, and Dr. Cutrer.

Prayer: That God will miraculously remove the cancer from Norm’s body. But if he chooses not to, prayer that Norm will have the strength of body, mind and spirit to endure and let the chemo do it’s work against the cancer with minimal side effects. We have two friends who are also traveling the cancer journey at this time, Tony and Donna, that they will find healing and refreshing as they walk the path before them.

Rejoice: Jesus Christ came into the world to live as a human. He revealed the character of God in his words and action. He suffered and died on the cross to provide a way for us to experience a relationship with God. While he walked among the people, he had compassion and mercy for all who suffered He healed the sick, delivered the oppressed, declared and demonstrated the love of God for all humanity.

Where’s the joy? “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him will not perish, but have everlasting life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him.” John 3:16-17.

Could God have delivered Norm from the cancer miraculously? yes. Why didn’t he? I don’t know. This I do know, God loves Norm and has him in the palm of his hand.

Despite the circumstances, I can have joy because the God who created all things, loves Norm and loves me.

In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1:6-9

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Reflections

I bought a towel that says “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, I am my mother after all.” My mother passed away last year, but her image lives on in each of her children…and in some of her grandchildren. Whether in physical appearance, behavior, or words, whenever we get together, at some point I think, “Wow. That is so Mom.”

At this time of year, we focus on Jesus as the baby in the manger. He limited himself to a human body, helpless and totally dependent on his parents for food, clothing, protection, and love. And like us, he grew up, experiencing all that the human life has to offer along with its joys and sorrows.

Jesus came to earth as the image of the invisible God, but mankind had become so hardened that they did not see the character of God. It had all been forgotten, set aside, lost in the day-to-day business of life.

When Philip asked to see the Father, Jesus replied, “Have I been with all of you for so long a time, and do you not recognize and know me yet Philip? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say then, ‘Show us the Father’?” (John 14:9) Even the disciples struggled to see Jesus for who he really was.

Over the years, our distortions color our perceptions of God. Some of us see him as one who does not care, an indistinct being somewhere out there. Others see him as a cruel taskmaster, punishing us for all offenses. Some deny his existence altogether.

And yet, Jesus took on our form, our sinful and warped image, and reflected the image of a perfectly holy and merciful God. He had compassion on those who hurt. He grieved with those who were in despair. He healed all who came to him for help. He went out of his way to talk to the unlovely. He had courage to challenge the self-righteous. And finally, revealing the enormity of God’s love for us, he embraced our sins and took them to the cross, dying in our place.

Jesus came as the reflection of God, compassionate, caring, holy and righteous. He died the reflection of man, self-serving, corrupt and sinful.

Though evil in our world distorts our perceptions, through Jesus Christ, we can not only come to know the true God, we too can reflect the image of God to a lost and distorted world. We can care for those around us. We can offer hope for those in despair. We can share God’s love, because Jesus demonstrated his love for us on the cross.

And the Word was made flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

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Transitions

We put our house on the market this week. 

I stand at the door, unsure of what waits on the other side. I didn’t think this door world come so soon. Opening a door is not new to me; transitions are a part of life but this one feels different.  

My first major transition came when I left the comfort of my Mom and went to kindergarten. Mom says that I came up with many reasons not to go, but off to school I went. There were good and bad days, but each year presented me with opportunities to learn and grow. 

I remember the excitement of going to college and then the apprehension when I waved goodbye to my parents and walked back to my dorm room. Surrounded by new faces and map in hand, I began the adjustment  to life away from home. Four years later I said goodbye to the comfort of college classes, friends and my parents bank account.

Could I make it on my own without my parents help? A new job, making my way through the maze of finances, time management, relationships…then the marriage to my best friend, a lifelong companion with whom to explore and enjoy the mysteries of life. 

Each transition came with challenges and opportunities. Doors opened and closed, always with the sense of anticipation, excitement for the possibilities and angst for the challenges. But each transition eventually became comfortable.

Three children came along. The options now included their development and experiences. They walked through their own doors leaving me with an empty nest. No longer responsible for their care, I began to put more into writing.  

Once again, I arrived at a place of comfort. Now, Norm’s retirement brought us to this new door. All the other doors of transition led to opportunities, explorations, new experiences, learning and growth.  Just because we are older doesn’t mean this one will be any different. We can stand on these truths.

  1. “This I recall to mind, therefore I have hope. It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.” Lam. 3:21-23. Everyday I can rely on the Lord, who does not change, to be faithful no matter what comes my way.
  2. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11. This promise has no age or stage of life limits. 
  3. “He who observes the wind will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap. In the morning sow your see, and at evening withhold not your hand, for you do not know which will prosper, this or that, or whether both alike will be good.” Ecc. 11:4,6.  My responsibility, step out in faith and don’t worry about the outcome.

 

I stand at the door of transition, unsure of what lies on the other side, but confident in the Lord God, who does not change.

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